I Can't Do It Alone

Ladies and gentleman
Miss Velma Kelly in an act of desperation

My sister and I had an act that couldn't flop
My sister and I were headed straight for the top
My sister and I earned a thou', a week at least
Oh, yeah
But my sister is now, unfortunately, deceased

I know it's sad, of course, but a fact is still a fact
And now all that remains is the remains
Of a perfect double act

Watch this!
Now you have to imagine it with two people
It's swell with two people

First I, then she, then we'd
But I can't do it alone
Then she'd, then I'd, then we'd
But I can't do it alone

She'd say, what's your sister like?
I'd say men
She'd say, you're the cats meow
Then we'd wow the crowd again

When she'd go, I'd go, we'd go
Then those ding-dong daddies started to roar
Whistled, stomped, stamped on the floor
Yelling, screaming, begging for more

And we'd say, okay fellas, keep your socks up
'Cause you ain't seen nothing yet

But I simply cannot do it alone

So what'd ya think, huh?
Come on, you can say
I know, you're right, the first part's shit
But the second part, the second part is really nifty
Okay

She'd go, I'd go, we'd go

And then those two-bit Johnny's did it up brown
To cheer the best attraction in town
They nearly tore the balcony down

And we'd say, okay boys, we going home
But before we go, here's a few more partin' shots
And this, this we did in perfect unison

Now, you've see me going through it
You may think there's nothing to it
But I simply cannot do it alone