Such Sufferin'

What a life it is
The hardships, the tears
The desperate years
Such sufferin', such sufferin'

Gimme a bufferin'!
And what have I got?
True, it's a lot!
But so what?
There's got to be more to being so great
To looking first-rate and staying out late
Just look at the state I'm in!

Oh!
Such sufferin'
My days are full of sufferin' and bufferin

I've really learned the hard way
That pastas and cakes
And french fries and steaks
Are not such great shakes
That castles in Spain are just a big pain
That life is inane if you're sufferin'
I'm not blufferin'!

Can't wonders like me learn how to be happy and grateful
For just a mere plateful of life's simple goodies?
I wish it were so but the answer is no

So I suffer
Get tougha
And don't get enougha
Anything

Us Super-Dupers are regular troopers
We give all we got
And believe it or not
That's a lot!
The standing ovations!
The keys to all nations!
Bermuda vacations!
Money! Success!
I'd settle for less

If I could stop this sufferin'
Oh such sufferin'
Foo on such sufferin'
Poo on such sufferin'
Oh, nuts to all this sufferin'
Gimme a bufferin'