Losing Streak

Hi there Porshia, I miss you girl
You moved on and I gotta be man enough to wish you well
Oh I'm so jealous of your new boyfriend
I can't lie, I wish it was I; I wish it was us
I gave you gifts but I ain't give you enough
I ain't give you the love
Look at me now, lonely as the man who stands on top
And I'd take both of my hands tryna turn back the hands on the clock
Rewind that bitch to the day we met
I'd do better, at least I'd try
You were an angel in disguise
Foolish I, I let you fly
I let you go, I let you slide
Fought my ego, blame my pride
I shoulda been tryna make you my bride, instead I was tryna feed you more lies
You're at home, I'm at the Telly turn off my phone
I ain't shit, this is what I get; Did you so wrong
Well they say hindsight is 20/20 and you don't appreciate until it's gone
And here I stand all on my own, all by myself; Here's where I belong
Just missing you, all season long
Dig for my heart and find an empty space cause you're still not home and I'm all alone

On my losing streak, on my losing streak
Say I'm going through hell, add one more "L" to my losing streak
Say I'm going through hell, add one more "L" to my losing streak
On my losing streak, on my losing streak
Say I'm going through hell, add one more "L" to my losing streak
Say I'm going through hell, add one more "L" to my losing streak

Hello momma, remember me
It's been so long, we hardly speak
No we don't talk not like we use to, no not the least
I made some choices within my life that you don't agree
I've been trying so hard to make you proud of me
I've been knocked down and I managed to still stand on my feet and not take a knee
Cause that's what you taught me, I learned it well
I never let a thorn penetrate my shell
If I want it, I go and get it myself
And I'll dig my own grave before I ask for help
I guess we're too stubborn for our own good
Cause we don't ever see eye to eye
And there ain't no good inside no goodbye
So here I write my open scribe
In my feelings, I'm too bold to hide
I thought my heart was too cold to cry
And I stand corrected
I know you'll be happy to see your son with a college degree but that's not me
I'm no scholar
I grew up with no role models and no one to follow
So I had to live a little to learn a lot
And honestly I earned everything I've got
Sorry momma, I love you dearly but I can not be who I'm not
So I'm only me

Hey unborn girl, daddy let you down
Cause me and momma couldn't stick together nor stick around
And truth is I'm probably gonna have to fight to be in your life
But I get stronger after every round so we'll be alright
Say hi to Jaylen, wave at Journey, smile at Kaya
You're all survivors
I almost gave up cause I was exhausted
I almost lost it, the pain just piled up
And lately I been a nervous wreck
Can't live this fast and not expect to crash
A few more minutes and this Christmas Eve woulda been my last
To have Milton back, I'd give my all
To keep them fed I'll give my last
No I'm not perfect, I'm nowhere near it
If that was a course, I flunked the class
I shoulda been a better man and I shoulda been a better son
I'm tryna better than I was yesterday before tomorrow comes
And talk is cheap, you don't profit none
I didn't believe in angels til I walked with one
I'd never seen a dove until I caught me one
Was too immature so I lost me one
I take my scars, earn every bruise
They say you can't win til you learn to lose
And here I stand no chance at peace
At war within me, virtuous me
Tryna steal a win on my losing streak