Quincunx

Alright, well, Bernard's not back but I'm gonna try this anyway
This is a song I wrote for the Bushwick Book Club
Which is also happening tonight
But which you are not at, 'cause you came here
This was for their show about the letter Q
And I feel like maybe I've had too much of this beer to do this song properly
But maybe not

Quincunx
Quincunx
Quincunx
Let's say you got five people
Quincunx
And they all wanna have sex with each other
Quincunx
I mean they wanna have a real good time
Quincunx
I mean they wanna have a lot of fun
Quincunx
But it might be a little awkward
Quincunx
Because they got two couples but then they got an extra one
Quincunx
Well, I think I've got an organizing principle
Quincunx
That's gonna solve all your problems

You put one on the left side
One on the right side
Another on the left side
Another on the right side
One in the middle
And form a
Quincunx

Quincunx
It's sorta like a square
Quincunx
But with five points

Quincunx
Now, let's say you're God
'Cause why not?
Quincunx
And let's say you're trying to design a real pretty flower
Quincunx
One that will show those gods from the polytheistic religions
Quincunx
'Cause some of them like your work, but most of them just think you're a hack
Quincunx
So when you're arranging those petals
Quincunx
You need something fresh, you need something new
Quincunx
Well, God, I think I got something for you

Put one on the left side
One on the right side
Another on the left side
Another on the right side
One in the middle
And form a
Quincunx

Quincunx
Oh wow, God's really stepping up his game
Quincunx
'Cause those petals, they're like, in a square shape
Quincunx
But with five petals

Quincunx
Now, let's say you're a dicemaker
Quincunx
'Cause why not? Two minutes ago, you were God
Quincunx
And you're trying to make the dice
You know, you put a dot in the middle for the one
And you put two dots sort of diagonally for the two
And then you combine them and make a diagonal line for the three
And you put, like, one in each corner for the four
But then you come to the five and you're like
"What do I do? Do I put them all one side?
Do I make a really long diagonal line?
It seems like it would be unbalanced"
Well, I got some advice
Why don't you just do what dicemakers have been doing for centuries
And put it in the shape of a quincunx?
Oh, you're not inventing dice
I should have explained that

So put one on the left side
One on the right side
Another on the left side
Another on the right side
One in the middle
And form a
Quincunx

Quincunx
I can't believe you thought you were inventing dice
Are you fucking stupid?