Long Night

The day I learned you tried to kill yourself again
My stomach shriveled up like a dead fly left out in the sun
It hurt so much to realize that I have no say
That I could never save you, it was always that way

And to think otherwise is selfishness
Like how when people die
And everyone makes it about themselves
Pity me for all your pain, the pain I could never understand
Despite my "I was the last person to talk to her" pleas
I could never shake you out of it
Like so much rattling of your cage
When you just swallowed the key
And no finger of mine
Can reach back in your throat and take it out

It's not enough, it never was
No words can make things alright again
No choir of angels, no golden rays
No one to see you through these dark alleyways
It's not enough, it never was
No words can make things alright again
No choir of angels, no golden rays
No one to see you through these dark alleyways
Death's like the ocean, and just like the ocean
We just return to the shifting tides

If I could only breathe you in
Or try to keep you close, you won't ever know
You were all I could think about
When I was fucking the last girl I slept with
This can't be fixed through long talks and late nights
I need to run away and cut off the pieces
Of you that can't be diluted through my
Piss that's laced with cheap whiskey and lack of sleep