Diary of a Madman

Yo anybody seen my diary?
Oh, there it is
I gotta write this shit down
Check it out

Dear Diary, I'm having a little problem
I can't make it by myself, maybe you can help me solve 'em
I'm confused and I don't know what to do
I'm hoping you can help me, 'cause there's no one else to talk to

I want to die, but it ain't for me
I try to talk to my dad, but my old man ignores me
He says I'm delirious
And I drink too much, so he doesn't take me serious

But little does he know I'm really losing it
I got a head, but ain't no screws in it
I be thinking deep
That's one of the reasons at night I can't sleep

I thought it would change when I was older
But even now I'm still peeping over my shoulder
There's your life after death too
And what about the man with the cane and the black suit?

And what about cancer?
Too many motherfucking questions, and not enough answers
Ain't no use in trying
We might as all face it, we were all born dying
There's a black book in Brad's hands
And it's the diary of a madman

Dear diary, today I hit a nigga with a torch
Shot him on his face and watched him die on his front porch
Left his family heartbroken
Flashbacks of him laying there bleeding with his eyes open

I can't put the shit behind me
I'm know I'm here somewhere, but I can't find me
I used to be a drug dealer
On the for reala, now I'm a born killer

And it ain't no changing me
It used to be hard, but now it ain't nothing to me
To go up to a niggas house
Put a pistol in his mouth, and blow his fucking brains out

No doubt if you cross then I'ma take ya
'Cause I'm a fucking killer by nature
You got an M11, bring your weapon
Huh, I got an AK-47

It's gonna be a bloody Sunday
'Cause your fucking with a nigga like Bundy
And I was taught not to kill
Like a Vietnam vet with a thousand-yard stare

So welcome to the slaughterhouse nigga
Red rum and I'ma be the grave digger
And if you want to cap, come cap me
I'm trigger-happy like my great-grandpappy

Just watch for the chrome in my right hand
My second entry from the diary of a madman

Dear diary, help me 'cause I'm frantic
Sometimes I think I'm going schizophrenic
The world's looking dark for instance
Maybe 'cause I'm looking from a distance

But then again I wear a blindfold
Staring at the motherfucking world with my eyes closed
To myself, I'm a stranger
Walking in the footsteps of danger

It's a long path ahead of me
I gotta get somewhere 'cause everybody here is scared of me
I had a job, but they fired me
My wife walked out now I'm living in my diary