You Can't Fade Me/JD's Gaffilin' (Medley)

Now the taste of alcohol is filling up my bladder
What's the date and time it don't matter
Had a pocket full of phone numbers I was trying to sort
To make a long story short
Ran into this girl named Carla
Knew her from the back seat of my homie's Impala
She said what's up yeah what's the deal
Check the hairdo of course it ain't real
Then I looked down she was fat in the front
I asked how long, well about seven months
Oh how time flies when you're having fun
She said yeah but the damage is done
Where you been, on a little vacation
Oh by the way congratulations
Who's the lucky man? I don't have a clue
Then she said the lucky man is you
I dropped my brew
And everything looked fuzzy
Not a baby by you the neighborhood hussy
She said yeah remember that date
I thought back and tried to calculate
Then I said damn are you sure it's mine
Cause I know you been tossed plenty of times
She said that day no I wasn't whoring
Your ass is mine that's when the sweat started pouring
Cause all I saw was Ice Cube in court
Paying a gang on child support
Then I thought deep about giving up the money
What I need to do is kick the bitch in the tummy
Naw cause then I'd really get faded
That's murder one cause it was premeditated
So what I'm a do
I don't have a clue
How many months left damn only two
I'm gettin' faded

No cigar, G
Ay yo homey man I'm getting faded

It's crazy cause before I could sleep with her
I had to duck and dodge and try to creep with her
See the booty and the front was all in place
But the girl had the pitbull face
So we ran jumped drove swam crawled hid
Oh lord god forbid
My homies see me at the motel
Cause those fools would love to just go tell
Everybody in the hood that knows your rep
So jump in the back seat and quiet is kept
And hold your big fat butt steady
Cause yo hoe I got the paper bag ready
She started moaning and gobbling like a turkey
I knocked the boots from here to Albuquerque
I dropped her off man and I'm knowing
That I'm a hate myself in the morning
I got drunk to help me forget
Yo another day another hit shit
I'm gettin' faded

Ay yo you know what time it is

Nine months later she's ready to drop the load
And everybody in the hood already knows
It's supposed to be mine so they laughing at me
You know Ice Cube can't be having that G
I'm thinking to myself why did I bang her
Now I'm in the closet looking for the hanger
JD and Jinx and T-Bone won't let up they won't shut up
I'm gettin' fed up bitch
Cause I know you're tryin' to break me
But if I find out your tryin' to fake me
I'm a buff that duff for a hoot
Beat ya down and leave a crown or two
That night she went into labor
And the shit is getting kinda major
The baby came out damn it was a lifesaver
Looking like my next-door neighbor
She said it was mine that was her best guess
But let's check the results of the blood test
I started smiling yeah cause it read negative
Damn why did I let her live?
After that I should've got the gat
And bust and rushed and illed and peeled the cap
But no I just told the hoe who laid me
Excuse me bitch it's a switch
You can't fade me

Naw baby not this way
Yo you ain't playing Ice Cube out like no booger
I don't fall for the okey-doke
And before I fall for the okey-doke
I let the pistol smoke
Now sing it
Yeah baby you can't fade me
Naw unfadable baby