Track 4+1

I wrote a book of all the things that go on in my head
I burnt it whole so no one would ever think those things again
I wore my old school uniform to see how much I'd grown
I needed to get out of my perspective the only one that I've ever known

so I'll try singing about the colours
I never knew I'd love
I can't bring any flowers
but I can bring the mud

I grow out my hair to count out each day
and I hoped you'd be aware of the things I didn't think to say
like your eyes could light up a whole room
and I'm kind of getting tired of being blinded by the thought of you

so I'll try singing about the colours
I never knew I'd love
I can't bring any flowers
but I can bring the mud
cause I've been burying myself alive
trying to call it quits
I sure as hell have burnt the boat down
but I won't jump ship

my heart leapt when I came home to the silence
cause I haven't spent enough time in the quiet
and yes I like spending time with people who aren't me
but I'm kind of getting tired
only being happy