Grey Skies

This time lapse impasse keeping it unethical
Stalled in all direction, restrained by hypotheticals
Imprisoned how I felt forced the sentence on myself
Waiting isolated in this solitary cell

From an internal wall that's delaying every task
This grey sky's a blue screen, bracing for the crash
Reality is different, covered by this mask
I see no looking past with this shadow overcast
Face the truth, but we can't so we make lies
Take pride, and leave that doubt by the wayside
Drop a match in the clouds and watch the flames rise
Fire water falling from these grey skies

Trapped beneath a grey sky feeling so uncertain
Self-imposed and nervous, over and it's curtains
Thoughts of any subject seem to amplify the consequence
Seeking a solution, all I really need is confidence
Wishing for decision like I'm faced with no delay
Second-guessing second guesses up until they go away
Still I can't release even though I know it's vain
Cause the slightest imperfection always drives me so insane
Writing lyrics, writing code, I'm just hoping that it flows
Just a function or a verse want to do it with the pros
Think about longevity, to never be disposed
I always want acceptance, you know just how it goes
Forest for the trees, see the sky for the clouds
There's a maze in this haze and I'm wandering around
Barely floating in this storm, I'm clutching to the sound
Feel I'm 'bout to drown from this torrent raining down
Keeping things adrift, but look who's at the helm
This ship's about to capsize, I'm feeling overwhelmed
Failure faces everyone, teachers and the students
Plus I know I'm capable and tell myself to do it
Show and then improve it so I did and took it up
Compromise is fine but how good is good enough
Awaiting motivation from a dozen other mottos
I just need a path, someone tell me what to follow

From an internal wall that's delaying every task
This grey sky's a blue screen, bracing for the crash
Reality is different, covered by this mask
I see no looking past with this shadow overcast
Face the truth, but we can't so we make lies
Take pride, and leave that doubt by the wayside
Drop a match in the clouds and watch the flames rise
Fire water falling from these grey skies

Rain clouds break down my cardboard wall of sound
Wishing it would clear but it's all around and how
Deep can I fall, seems there's no letting up
Pressed against the pavement to prevent getting up
Recessed into the basement, need to step it up
Affliction or addiction, I can never get enough
Fear of the success got me working under pressure
Plotting possibilities beyond what I can measure
Call it over-engineered, impossibly prepared
Til I'm standing still in place on an endless flight of stairs
And everything spins out, worse than I'd imagined
Terrified of failure even though I make it happen
Looking in the mirror and upset at what's inside
Always been my biggest critic, it's the only way I thrive
It's a mix of good and bad so I take it all in stride
Gotta live it up, otherwise it's just survive

An antiquated backlash to those that would control me
Jumping up on stage 'til the rhythm couldn't hold me
Ushered in an era, kept it classic feeling lonely
Never leave me only love me tell me you're my one and only
All I've got is my word and my code and my flow
If you're taking this away then there's nowhere else to go
We cultivate it, seed it, and we got to watch it grow
Even though it all accelerates we meant to take it slow
Feared we couldn't make it, scared of empty shows
But pushing past your limits is the only way to know
Praying to the past, waiting, tell me when to go
Rise above the clouds, pause and check to look below
Searching for a challenge I was ready blow for blow
So we got up in its face, and we're standing toe to toe
Measuring ourselves, won't compare to so and so
Arriving from the future, we are here to overthrow