I'm a Paradox

I think every moment I spend with you
Could always end in tragedy
But I still want you to want me
It's such a double standard
So scared you'll walk out on me
When half the time I wanna do the same
And everything just hurts my brain
It's not because I don't love you
But because I know my heart's not true
But I still try and love the same
I hope you try to love the same

My soul is filled with envy
Is that all you see in me?
It's all I see in me

Every time you talk to her
I feel all of my insides burn
And I know that I shouldn't be
But I am and will be for eternity
I wish I could change the stars
To make it so I'm not so far
But there's only so much I can do
To try and make it back to you

My soul is filled with fear
In me, is that all you hear?
In me, it's all I hear

But in the case you don't love me
In my heart, I'll always be waiting
Just in case you fall in love with her
I won't be angry, please just take my word
Cause honestly I'll never be
Capable to love somebody
I'm sorry dear to waste your time
So go and find a love better than mine