Talks with Loneliness

It is crazy.
It is like,
you wake up
only to
meet loneliness.
Im afraid to be alone sometimes.
Im afraid of bein' vulnerable cuz
What if i cld nvr let u go yea
I cant lie i run smtms i be weak
For weeks n weeks them long nights i cant sleep.
I want somebody next to me.
That side of the bed is so cold.
How am i supposed to give my heart,mind n my soul
to someone that i cant see.
God, please excuse me.
I'm tryna be honest.
Seeking you when I feel alone is the hardest.
N my heart is just a canvas
who is longing for an artist.
Brush strokes on my soul
I hope eventually i get the picture
Cuz i cant crop you out cuz who you r is in the mirror.
Go figure, im just tryna figure it out.
It makes 7 figures, but my soul has been in z drought.
N i cant make it rain unless unless u reign in my life
N i cant open up my heart unless i have you inside.
All i ever really wanted was someone on my side.
But loneliness has been the one that's always down for the ride.
N i don't always have the answer so I question your love
N i don't always measure up but still you say I'm enough.

All i ever really wanted was somebody to love.
N you been knocking at my door but i cant open up.

So many mistakes i made
So many of these games i played
I always say I'm complicated,
The cover of my real frustrations
I need patience, I need time
To rewind to when I was 12
I lost my trust in my mind, my mom I rejected
Emotions felt neglected
Tryna let go of these memories n hold on to this necklace.
N he tells me that I'm so worth loving

But why did life do me wrong if I was so worth loving.
I think the bigger picture is that you're so worth loving
N you still have my heart even when I have nuthin'.

N i cant make it rain unless unless u reign in my life
N i cant open up my heart unless i have you inside.
All i ever really wanted was someone on my side.
But loneliness is not the one coming along for the ride.

N i don't always have the answer so I question your love
N i don't always measure up but still you say I'm enough.
All i ever really wanted was somebody to love.
N you been knocking at my door so imma open it up.

At some point, I have to stop trusting in
The things that I've used to protect me n
surrender to the truth that God says about me.
Just because I feel alone doesn't mean I am alone.