Blue Like Jazz

Deep mental conflictions as I feel these chest pains
I've become a master at finesse
An accidental pro at mind games
I can persuade people to believe me and call me one of the best
So hear me now I'm calling this out I confess
Please take this talent away from me and take this skill too
Deep down inside of me it's not who I am or what I really want to be
I'm starting to identify with these learned behaviors
Practiced them thoroughly cuz deep down inside I still feel cowardly
It's charisma in action followed by an alternative motive
To persuade the other side and make them feel like they know this
People like familiarity it brings about closeness
Eventually they believe it and accept it as real
Manipulation scares me soft core mind control
It leaves a scar in the mind like an open sore
An open possibility for a void in something to bore
An idea to be had but forcibly not yours

Yet people do these things cuz they have everything to lose
Lost in faith time and abuse so they choose to be blue
It's something they covet a power to be had
To control someone's life isn't that sad
We do this on the daily in just about every relationship that we have
Just look at all the kids it's hand over hand
We encourage independence but we punish it in action
We might as well all be divided up into these hungry factions
Don't know if I'm paranoid for thinking these thoughts
But looking back on my life I've definitely lost lots
From the people that have controlled me and didn't let me live
Who tried to stop me in acting as I did
We manipulate to survive it's human nature
But it's not something that I want to presume or wish to nurture
To openly know this and yet still practice it fully
Is evil by heart and completely savage