Diamond (Interlude)

The hardest thing you'll ever leave behind is puppy love
Made a diamond of your heart, this pretty gift from God above!
Lowering your tough exterior to show the truth
A starving boy, searching for fruit
He'd been brutalized and more often than not, he got rejected
By those whom he beheld, like they could sense it on his presence
The sentence read: "a lonely kid lost to depression"
'Til an angel sent from heaven imparted new directions
And the stresses sent from home became an ambiance, of sorts
Taking dresses off, there go my cargo shorts!
Throw a bone 'til quarts of water are the only solution
Commercial break from slaughter, with an awkward exection
And I'm losing my sense of self, there goes my mental health!
Suddenly unburdened by the panic, then I FELT!
Melted on the bed, it'd been such a long time
She treated me like a human being, I started crying

I was no good for you!
Never seemed to do anything I could for you!
Both had a few on the side, shared a view of the ride
That we crashing while you drive, at 102

She was my first girlfriend!
In the real sense of the word, we were lovers in the blur
She was my first girlfriend!
We were both a couple nerds, way more horny than preferred
She was my first girlfriend!
Should've listened when I heard, she would hurt me for a flirt
But she was my first girlfriend!
Wanted nothing else but her, she way more than I deserve
She was my first girlfriend!
In the real sense of the word, we were lovers in the blur
She was my first girlfriend!
Should've listened when I heard, she would hurt me for a flirt
But she was my first girlfriend!
Even getting on my nerves, she could tell me where to swerve
She was my first...

We been fucking since the third time I came to her house
She curled her hair, white dots on the red of her blouse
Gotta skip to Chinatown, 'cause "Scotty Doesn't Know!"
They ain't quite broken up, although we breaking her vows
Thought I saw an opening, and came up on "the One"
What a joke, I wasn't focusing, she'd only begun
Oh, look what I've done, let our loving become
Always getting texts and lying 'bout who they're from
By the time I'm out in Costa Rica, her motives weaker
And she speaking to my friends like a sexy trouble-seeker
I even punched the homie in the face, when he went deeper
Tried to get my girl's pussy placed on his Little Peter
But I wouldn't trace me either, my hands dirty too
By the time we really end, my body-count like 32
Or thereabouts, it's hard to count when you worry to blue
Type to stand in crowds and shout and they still haven't a clue
But the truth I'm holding out, is she's the first on the Earth
That could pry the spout from out me and nurse all my hurt
Only one who knew about the dirt, still saw my worth
She really heard me out, and shared my cumbersome curse
So despite me spurting out my verse of ancient complaints
If you peek behind the curtain, I was really to blame
I hadn't claimed any certainty in my person, or name
My relationship with Stephanie was just more of the same

She was my first girlfriend!
Wanted nothing else but her, she way more than I deserve
She was my first girlfriend!
In the real sense of the word, we were lovers in the blur
She was my first girlfriend!
Should've listened when I heard, she would hurt me for a flirt
But she was my first girlfriend!
Even getting on my nerves, she could tell me where to swerve
She was my first...

It's really awkward to write this, I feel so shamed by my ego
So let me drop the self-righteous lighting and empty the depot
Thought love was a placebo by this point, and libido
Was the motive to my actions when I'm failing to veto
I was eaten by the passion, too explosive for a lasting
Relationship with an average, compassionate woman
I barely speak of what happened, it's too corrosive for chatting
But she was weak and stabbing, from her perspective, was cushion
In retrospect, that's a diamond in her bosom