Bad Thoughts

I'm sick of life cause nothing ever goes right for the outcast
Suicidal thoughts with a knife to the head
Is it worth to be alive or dead?
So many eyes on heads, staring viciously ahead
At the victims bleeding red while they're living on the edge
Bad thoughts talking for ya but it wasn't what you said or what you thought
Do they care when you talk?
Nervous, walking on egg shells, falling down, weaker than hulk
Nobody cares, they shove you in an square and disappear
Walking round, claiming that they're there for ya
But who is there when you're going through a nightmare?
Fading through the darkness, breathing in the night air
Don't feel like living here cause you don't fit anywhere
So many stares, It kills you with tears to fear that
You might break down when you walk
Through the valley of death 'inside your mind that's filled with bad thoughts

I gotta good heart but with bad thoughts
And it's not my fault why I feel this way

I gotta good heart but with bad thoughts
And it's not my fault why I feel this way

I keep running away, I keep running
I keep running away, I keep running

I'm sick of money cause I don't have enough to live
Growing older in this life with no wife or kids
Feel like an failure, surrounded by the evil laughter
I hold the tension in me tight but I might be in danger
To snap on anything or anyone that's in my sight
Like I'm on a rampage but with lyrics that I write
As I'm ripping up the pages and screaming at the walls
I would turn my feelings raw and yell "screw 'em all" with love
But I ripped my heart out of place and ate it raw
Voices dialing up my brain, about to make the call
And break the words to say what I don't ever wanna say
Talk is cheaper than feelings without the pay, I'm okay, no I'm not
Mind racing and refuses to stop
Until I reach the finish line of death 'after I rot
From a breakdown that happens whenever I walk
Through the depths in my mind that's filled with bad thoughts, hear me?

I gotta good heart but with bad thoughts
And it's not my fault why I feel this way

I gotta good heart but with bad thoughts
And it's not my fault why I feel this way

I keep running away, I keep running
I keep running away, I keep running

I gotta good heart but with bad thoughts
And it's not my fault why I feel this way

I gotta good heart but with bad thoughts
And it's not my fault why I feel this way

I'm sick of people judging me when they don't know me 'mentally
I'm difficult to understand for nobody to remember me
When I was in my past or would suffer in the dark
Till a flash started burning in my lonely, cold heart
Where is love to distract me from the aftermath?
Of all my episodes running me through panic attacks
That would drain me deep inside the waves of pain
With electricity that's strong enough to tase my brain
For me to be forever cursed and feel no happiness
I heard a voice telling me to feel inadequate with weight on my shoulders
To be colder to toxic closure
Until I get closer to losing composure
As I wrote a story that draws the stares back
But it's so many stares that I feel my fears coming back
On the mic when I talk to my demons that are guilty of assault
From destroying my mind that's filled with bad thoughts

I gotta good heart but with bad thoughts
And it's not my fault why I feel this way

I gotta good heart but with bad thoughts
And it's not my fault why I feel this way

I gotta good heart but with bad thoughts
And it's not my fault why I feel this way

I gotta good heart but with bad thoughts
And it's not my fault why I feel this way