OLD PHOTOS

I wanna cry with you
I wanna cry with you
I wanna cry with you
I wanna cry with you

Now here I am looking at photographs of me
I'm staring at these pictures of the man I used to be
I'm looking close for differences in how I would appear
I'm looking in my eyes and I see fear
Depression
I notice how my family looked worried all the time
We smiling but just take another look into our eyes
The story of the sorrow is the story of our lives
It took us such a long time to genuinely smile
Depression
Now a nigga writing songs about the feel
Remembering the times I couldn't sleep without a pill
Popping paracetamol hoping it numbs the pain
And then I'd go to sleep and hope I wouldn't see the day
Depression
I was tired of the living and I didn't know
Why
I didn't understand what I was living for
Still don't understand it but these days I'm living in the mo
Back in the days I was drinking slow
Depression
See I wanted to be feeling all them sips that I was taking
I was playing death I put myself in different situations
This another way of begging for forgiveness from myself
Cause if I don't remember when I was mistaken
Depression
Usually I deal with paranoia through the isolation
Someone told me that the idle mind's a soccer field for Satan
Cause that's where his goal is
And he definitely scored it
I was seven when I had my first run with
Depression
I remember when Patricia was crying cause she was terrified
Told me money changes niggas
Now I'm running away from petty change cause nigga
I don't ever wanna make the same mistake my nigga
I've seen money turning lovers to the hate my nigga
Tricia told me nothing's gonna be the same
People are corrupt she said
Money feeds the flame
And I had that money on my brain
Depression
Man Piano Lady told me everything's gon' be okay
I used her as a crutch a way of forgetting the pain
And for a moment honestly the pain was all gone
Until the little moment went away
Depression
Take it back a little
Man the little nigga was a stoner
Kicking it with psychedelic moments every morning
Get a little a low and I would go back to smoking
Even though it didn't help me cope with
Depression
I talk about the West like those days were any better
I was pretty sure I hit my lowest in the Western
Maybe I was compensating with all of the friendship
They all made it easier to handle the depression
And honestly I loved it
Everything was harder when I left the hood of dozen
First time I returned it was to bury my cousin
And she was 11
Depression
Nothing hard as telling your mother you wanna die
With two children looking you directly in the eye
Two children you know that you are supposed to guide
But so far teaching them that it's okay to cry
Thoughts of suicide
Depression filling my mind
Texted my father told him I blamed him
The man was always a stranger I told him I felt endangered
And he voice messaged me back
Said he's sorry that he caused us so much anger
Depression
He apologized for leaving us to chase the cash
Said that life was never about what you're making and
Said he hoped we could forgive him
Cause he knows the pain he caused us
And he's sorry that he couldn't be the greatest dad
Now I stare at old photos feeling all kinds of resentment
I don't wanna give my family this new perspective
I don't wanna tell them he went in a new direction
Can't forgive him I feel stupid being glued to this
Depression

I wanna cry with you
I wanna cry with you
I wanna cry with you
I wanna cry with you