Can't Go Home

It's too much. Just don't know if I have it in me to do this anymore

We don't go back this time
For a place to call my own, for a place that I call home
We don't go back this time; if everything is failing, why should I try
For a place to call my own, for a place that I call home
Come on

So much grey, so much haze
So much weighs I waste the day
And hide from the world in my bed
Trying to stop the doubt in my head
And if I can it'll only make me stronger
And if I can't, won't be hearing me much longer
A hunger, searching for new heights
Catch the wind and hope to take flight
And if not when I crash and burn
A lesson learned, a page that turns, and I've yearned
For the day I quit the 10 to 9
Finally, be making music my full-time
22 years to 23 years
For too many years been bleeding these tears
Until the day I'm finally getting thru this
That's the day I'm finally gon' do this

We don't go back this time
For a place to call my own, for a place that I call home
We don't go back this time; if everything is failing, why should I try
For a place to call my own, for a place that I call home
Come on

I can't change, I can't remain the same
I can't stand another day in this rain
Living life, it's a game but worried about the cost
I'm giving it everything, the peace in me lost
Gotta grow, forget the past, and let it go
Shoulda known been walking this road all alone
On my own, I'm constantly searching for a home
Till I atone and weep for every seed sewn
Staring in the mirror and the man that's looking back at me
Is one I thought I'd never see, it's hard for me just to believe
It must deceive, I can't achieve, why won't life just let me be
It's getting harder just to breathe, I can't escape this fantasy
I owe so many people money, I'm just sinking further
37 and single because I know I'll hurt her
Just a deserter, disguising myself a high searcher
My only way out is looking like self-inflicted murder

We don't go back this time
For a place to call my own, for a place that I call home
We don't go back this time; if everything is failing, why should I try
For a place to call my own, for a place that I call home
Come on

Why am I always second guessing like every choice
Why am I speaking like I've never really had a voice
Why am I hoping on a never-coming future day?
What is it that's gone wrong that makes me feel this way
And if I was to walk away today
I feel I said everything I could say
None of it I would ever take back
I swear I love every one of y'all and that's a fact

We don't go back this time
For a place to call my own, for a place that I call home
We don't go back this time; if everything is failing, why should I try
For a place to call my own, for a place that I call home
Come on