Myself

"Critics choose what I should like
Such a strain, my mind has felt
Now I've got to live for myself"

Reside in seven-oh-four but repping eight-four-five
Home of ill unknown niggas, grinders and low lives
Known quite well to all for my writing, spit graffiti
Hoping mom will see her son rise, no Rafiki
Always ice a venue, cold hearted with no burners
Still wanting smoke, fortune and fame, throw in furnace
No concern, thus by far, bars a surplus
Course they try to bite off that, niggas serpents
Enough random talk, standing tough, New York made me
Merciless, monster murdered a mother's baby
Sister sought in me simple, smote deficiencies
Smack me silly, still managed to grow proficiencies
History, honest, depressing, try to suppress it
But when mama took me outta that hole, God, it's a blessing
Stigmata was festered, now, is it me? You niggas smell me?
Introvert hiding so much pain, my silent yelling didn't
Help me, mental, opposite Munchausen
What's true normalcy? Noggin was much clouded
Maybe too used to the constant of roughhousing
Idea, self-defense, thought of it's dumbfounding
Is it from being brainwashed? I don't fucking know
The thought of leaving home made me stumble to the floor
But after the freedom, the muscles come to grow
Always love, but your presence, I want you nevermore
That's because

"I've got to live for myself"

When I met you, never thought that I
Would be best friends, heaven-sent angel in disguise
No mirage, so I thought, quite a journey stood abroad
Conversation struck, sight of pain's savior into art
Tattooed to arm, because the symbol gave me voice
Appreciated arts like I, though visual's your choice
Out of the blue, to fruition, true friendship
No sign at first, type to get off at boot licking
Don't know what captivated me, never berated me
Gave me an ear that listened, that's what elated me
An open book with blank pages to fill me in
Blind sighted to signs of obstacles to still be friends
What reeled me in, we relate to each other's qualms
So it felt good to have your spirits hands in my palms
We just met at wrong time for something to go on
But neither of us doubted, together we were strong
Gave me a bigger voice, something always needed, you
Were the first person I shared my darkest secret to
Helped me tell my suicidal thoughts, take the scenic route
Never wanted to see the day I must be leaving you
But something changed, because narcissism found you
Went from saying that you cared to world evolves around you
For what you did, all trust is gone, don't deserve that
But thanks for the memories and helping me to learn that

"I've got to live for myself"