Scared to be Loved

I've made first moves and paid my dues to my vices
I've lived years twice removed from flesh and blood
I'd jump out a plane without being shoved
Yet, somehow, I am scared of being loved

In high school my brakes failed on the highway
And in that moment I accepted my fate
To be washed away in that tail light flood
Still somehow I am scared of being loved

We build walls around holes
All littered throughout our souls
Yea some people run from love all their lives
Still houses are not homes
When occupied alone
Still I default to being some lonely guy, don't ask me why

I've said goodbye to faces dying
And wondered if they felt peace or fear
And which I might feel when my end is near
Considering how I'm still scared of being loved

I've got no great hope or aspiration
Though evidence might be calling my bluff
Deep in my heart I know I'm enough
Yet, somehow, not enough to be loved