Emotional Motives

Once more you've become a thought I can't describe
An emotion I can't shake
And I'm trying to pretend I don't want you
But this glass of denial might break

Maybe it's my hormones fucking with my mental
But it took you this long to realize my potential
Wondering why you didn't see me the way I was presenting myself to you before
Because my thoughts on you are still gripping me
My hands are still sore

My hand on the handle of your door
That I can't be let into
Because it's you that I'm into
But this shit is consequential
And my feelings confidential

Holding this feeling of jealousy
In a box made of secrecy
Never knowing this feeling to wash over me
So I'm coming clean

Because in your presence
My body shifts
My thoughts rearrange
And my mind focuses on you

I'm wondering what you're thinking
While wondering what to think
Grasping on the why's
Because you've disappeared from my mind

But that was before
And then you re-appeared once more
Thinking of you in a capacity of hope
But still questioning my emotional motives
Still picturing you under candlelit votives
Your light in this darkness

I ask for the purpose
My thoughts on you
And will they make a home to stay
Or will they just go away

And when
Can I give in
To the motives
Of this emotion

Emotional Motives