Sometimes

As I bust down this Backwood
I see you over there smoking too
And to tell you the truth
I ain't seen eyes like you since I was like two
Where you from what you do
Who ya crew
Who the one you smoke and chill wit
Who ya god sisters and ya cousins
Girl where ya mother
And her mother
With all due respect
All of yall blessed
With all due respect
I'm tryna puff puff pass better than ya ex
I'm not being cocky I roll it the best
Respectfully
My tongue is a talented instrument
And the words coming out of it pay bills
Always a lot and sometimes
And sometimes when I smoke
I see a crystal ball in the clouds
Images of you smiling and so proud of me standing there in all my glory
Bridging his and her story
And as that cloud evaporates I chase another high
Another image of you smiling and so surprised
Bringing more tears to my eyes
Your happiness is my sativa
Giving me life and energy
Even when it don't
Ooo... it still do
I feel you
I feel everything you ever went thru
From families torn to families reborn
I stood right beside you
Because you stood and held on to me like I was the prize too
And that's why I hate when we smoke in awkward silence

Because it feels like I'm puffin pass the questions
I'm really afraid to ask you
Scared like I don't even know you
But the beauty is you never been afraid to unmask you
My Clair Huxtable
No Mr. Incredible
Just us little untouchables
Life was nothing but trouble
But you took it like you was on vacation
The definition of god's graces
Please would you mind replacing
Your cigarette with my Backwood
So we can float together on occasions
I know it ain't exactly father and son
But these backwoods can be
Our footballs and we can pass memories to each other
Like remember back when it was cold
As the Baltimore woods outside
And we stood shivering in front of Ms. Rosie's house at eight
Because the daycare didn't open until nine
In a concrete jungle where
Foster care is a common relief
You had the guts to keep us
Tightly packed in the pearl of your pride
Shit we gong to need nineteen blunts
Cuz we moved over nineteen times
Some of those stories make my voice shake
But my lungs learned how to tolerate the truth
The smoke clears and it's really you
No crystal ball
You're in the flesh
Aging from puffy to sadiddy
I promise I'm so optimistic I'm going to retire you before you even turn fifty
And you already fifty-two
You know I hope believe and pray
That you could one day use those divine tools you call hands
To bless the rituals that I use to connect with you
Because my always, a lot, and sometimes
Is increasing by the pounds
And I can't take credit for a dime
But it would mean the world
To always have a safe space to split those sessions with you
If not a lot then just sometimes
Sincerely your son