Mother (feat. Sylvana Joyce & the Moment)

Checkin' out the singles pages, I'm so sad I could sob
Dumpin' guys on first dates has become my full-time job
They need help with their bills, lights, and car and heat
I got fifteen kids back home and my ex is a deadbeat

What's tougher than a mother?
Setting bones and drying tears
Workin' three gigs, they eat more than pigs
I haven't slept in fifteen years
What's tougher than a mother?
To every virus I am immune
Make bathtub gin like Miss Hannigan
Don't make me take out my wooden spoon

Furniture's stained with breast milk and most of my clothes are too
They use too much toilet paper every time they gotta sh-sh-sh
These brats, they drive me crazy, so I buy out all of the wine
Laundry's out of control, that's why I'm great with these clotheslines

What's tougher than a mother?
Setting bones and drying tears
Workin' three gigs, they eat more than pigs
I haven't slept in fifteen years
What's tougher than a mother?
Might drive off, leave them in the rearview
Make bathtub gin like Miss Hannigan
I can't beat them, so I'm gonna

I'm gonna beat you
I'm gonna beat you
I'm gonna beat you, you, you
I'm gonna beat you
Honey, where's my wooden spoon