Flowers That I Never Sent

By the time your hearing this
Your probably thinking you heard everything
But this
This is everything

I love you more than you could ever know
It seeps into my melodies rhythms and my flows
I know they'll all tell me just to let it go

For the flowers that I never sent
All the love I said I'd give
But instead was neglect
I always thought I'd treat you right
But messed up in the end
And this ain't no excuse
I'm speaking wid all of my chest

I hope that rico's looking for me
While I'm on my own
He fuck with me tho I'm tainted
Got the purest soul

Had no intention
Of breaking you bit by bit
While the pressure starts to build
And the walls are way too thin

Shattered glass
I pick the pieces that I lost
But it don't matter
If it's only for a backwards path

I ain't involved in any spirals
The only loop is wild night
Shit I should of got you that on vinyl

So many petty laughs
But they ain't deeping
That I'm speaking for a reason
Just to show you I deserve a chance

But they would rather laugh
I guess it's hoodie szn
So don't blame me if I fade
When I embrace the dark

One
That's it
This EP shows you that I'm different
When you left me I was still a kid

Adolescence
Blessed me with it's presence
Told me it was waiting for the day
I was looking within

So I'm grateful
Cause now I balance my unstable
Mind
I think logically
Possibly to make me able
Writing every word
To be heard
Certain phrases on repeat
That's how it feels
When you put yourself
Inside a curse

I'm sending you the flowers that I never sent
I hope their worth all the memories disregarded from your brain
And every single hour at work that I spent
You get the message
And the fact is
That a nigga not same
As any of the jokers that you had in the past
I'm a constant you can't tell me
I was only temporarily having your heart
Make this the very end or start
I coming back outside the dark

Let me take you them coffee dates
We got the cafe just up the road
It's been a minute since we stepped
They told me that they're sad
When they don't see our face
Your favourite little place

When you needed space
In my head I really thought that it was the done
And my only way to numb the pain
Was put myself inside the state
Then I'm shaking in your arms
Heart beating fast
Mind in a trance

Now I say I'm coping
Cause I finally started thinking twice
Fuck them therapists
My therapy is music in my life
Let my heart cry
And the demons just absorb the pain
I ain't tripping not today

I made a mistake
It's my flaw
So I started pushing you away

And when your gone
I can't even try describe the pain
That's why I gotta write this project
Even just to say
(Even just to say)

I sent you some flowers
And their the ones I was meant to send
Call me stupid but I thought they'd hold some sentiment
Still my favourite
So I'll face it
If it is the end
But I would try a million times
In this life just to show you that I'm found again
Caru ti my little flower
May you rest your head
My love overrides the pain that I caused to you
It extends and proves that I'm adoring you
Just the honest truth

And thats everything
Thats all I got to give

I love you more than you could ever know
I know I'm stupid
Cause I love you so much
I can't even let it go