Siblings

Tell me how this shit makes sense I've seen blood switch quicker than a paid ref
I've seen friends switch up for the paycheck
When I got paid less, I seen people's face less
When shit was all good, it was all good
They would watch paint dry if I wanted to
Now to get people together, it's impossible
Ain't it funny how they see you when you down and low
I would've thought since they was down before
and faced obstacles
That they'd understand where I was coming from
I seen snakes in the grass for some months that done passed
If they hiss once don't just stop, you go
We done chased all type of goals, all type of hoes
We would sit and laugh and type all kind of jokes
But when I stop providing, they go up and go
Stop feeding people, watch what that hunger do

I know, what we are
We not blood, but we are
We stayed solid, we stayed strong
We need each other, more than we know

I ain't ever have a brother or a sister
Just friends who grew closer every minute
I ain't never have to grow up with a sibling Fighting battles on my own in my room, it get daunting
Never had friends, had fam since day one
Had mans who got my back if you say some
If you disrespect them, I'ma let bullets come rain down
Spray rounds for my fam and hope they do the same now
Cause I been fighting demons
On my own, all alone, in this room I keep thinking
What if I put a piece of cold chrome to my brain
I get these thoughts every weekend
I feel weaker, I need to speak up
I need help shit, but I don't seek it
I feel stuck shit, I feel beat up
I pray to God I find a way to start healing

I know, what we are
We not blood, but we are
We stayed solid, we stayed strong
We need each other, more than we know

How you supposed to be sis, but I ain't heard from you since
I was at my lowest low, you just left me for dead
Wanted me at your birthday, and I wanted to attend
But I was broker than broke, beyond negative in my chase
Credit cards maxed out, got two or three dollars in my wallet pouch
And you was worried bout how I ain't show up
When honestly, I was thinking bout this life and how I want it out
Almost wasn't even breathing for your birthday Couldn't even get out of bed, you thought that'd be the first day
You don't know half the shit I was dealing with
Dealing with my consciousness, fighting fucking demons
I don't even know where time had went
And now you're back turned, I get it, I got it
Now I won't be a problem, just forget I exist
I almost didn't so copy, just live in a world
That was always the reality

I know, what we are
We not blood, no we aren't
We stayed solid, we stayed strong
Until we didn't, but no love is lost

I have a couple bros left that I can count on one hand
And the ones who still here, they'll forever be my mans
I was sleeping on my bros floor, depression beat my ass
He don't even know, he almost found me hanging from the fan
But nah, I'm stronger than that
He did more than he knows and I can't thank him for that
I'll always be in debt, I'm more thankful for that
And his fam gon' get a check for every night I done spent
And my brothers had my back, every time that I fell
So many gave up on me, so I gave up on myself Had a couple people left, kept me fighting for real
Did you forget who you are, and all the things that you built
Shit, you might be right
Only reason I'm still breathing is cause my guys
And my girl too, she kept me sane and alive
And made sure I ate it, and stayed awake just to grind

I know, what we are
We not blood, but we are
We stayed solid, we stayed strong
We need each other, more than we know

I have a couple bros left that I can count on one hand
And the ones who still here, they'll forever be my mans