Where I Started From (Raw Demo Version)

I've paid for my mistakes
I've paid in money, and in blood sweat and tears by the lakes
I've regained what I lost in the wake
Of all the chaos I exacerbated, and the blame that I should take
I started over, after losing all my hope
Fell in love with dope, only to divorce it, and then learn to cope
I've survived the noose
And even though I tied the knot myself I thank God it came loose

Round and round we go
Never end up in the same place that I started from
Round and round we go
Looking back I came a long way from where I started from
Round and round we go
I told myself never to forget where I started from
Round and round we go
A small piece of me will always be where I started from

I wonder, am I bad, am I going to hell
We all know we've done enough dirt to rot in a cell
I'm not a killer, or a rapist, and I don't touch kids
I mean I'll kill and rape the mic but that's just wordplay kid
In my heart I know I'm sorry for any wrong that I did
I took a few people down into my world of hell and sin
I had to realize that these burdens I was holding weren't mine
I used to be someone else burden too at one time

That's the Gemini in me, always two sides
That explains why I can't make up my mind
I'm the product of a demon and an angel combined
Hanging around my horns is a halo that shines
Yea, I'm part psychopathic, grab a knife in wrath and slash it
But first wrap my pad in plastic, so it don't get splashed with splatter
From when I take your head and gash you, till the blade comes out the back
Feel like God got me blacklisted, cause not even hell will take me back
Not even hell will take me back

Round and round we go
Never end up in the same place that I started from
Round and round we go
Looking back I came a long way from where I started from
Round and round we go
I told myself never to forget where I started from
Round and round we go
A small piece of me will always be where I started from

I said I paid for my mistakes
But that ain't true I have a few I'm taking to my grave
I became a slave to all the thoughts that replay in my brain
My ADD decaying at a cost I can't pay to maintain
Or when I used to put a needle in my vein and shoot cocaine
To mute the pain, I'd scream insane, awake and do it all over again
Imagine shooting coke, just to wake up from the dope
Damn, when I look back, I don't know how I kept hope
I was constantly walking this slippery slope over misery moats
Will he slip or he won't, considers his kids or he don't
I was a goner if I stayed out on the streets any longer
But I'm so glad I woke to live, my kids ain't getting any younger

That's the Gemini in me, always two sides
That explains why I can't make up my mind
I'm the product of a demon and an angel combined
Hanging around my horns is a halo that shines
Yea, I'm part psychopathic, grab a knife in wrath and slash it
But first wrap my pad in plastic, so it don't get splashed with splatter
From when I take your head and gash you, till the blade comes out the back
Feel like God got me blacklisted, cause not even hell will take me back
Not even hell will take me back

Round and round we go
Never end up in the same place that I started from
Round and round we go
Looking back I came a long way from where I started from
Round and round we go
I told myself never to forget where I started from
Round and round we go
A small piece of me will always be where I started from