Dead in My Eyes

Look at me dead in my eyes
Heart palpitations, feel the Benny's arrive
Feelings for women is something I'm great at setting aside
They often come into my life and you know
Fuck up the vibe
They all lost or in a battle with pride
Regardless what it was, they end up wasting my time
I'm too far ahead, so they can't come from behind
I put in too much work, I can't be living a lie
I recognize that it's toxic if I sit by the fire
I wasted all them nights tryna make someone mine
I wasted all them nights tryna just feel alive
But that's on me
This the reason I been losing my sleep
I'm off six and having trouble to speak
The text back was a paragraph and I'm too tired and too weak
I'm still a man, but the kind type
And the goal is still a wife, when the time's right
Fuck fame I ain't trippin off the limelight
She said "Geno how you feel?"
Rarely do I lose now
Hear the bell and start running like schools out
Used to play it on mute, now they quick to press the button
When I put another tune out
Back in Chula Vista, hit the switch and threw the noose out
I broke a couple hearts soon as I moved out
Shawty did me foul, I did her fouler
No remorse is just the move now
People I grew up with hit they peak in High School
A couple years later and they tuned out
Back then I was the class clown
And it's still funny
Bank account dummy, who the fool now?
Every love I felt was short lived
Every time we fell, they forfeit
4th quarter and we surely on a run
Doing what I did a year ago, in a month
Before I gave in, before I made ends meet
The pills on fish scales, before they kill me
Soul still not sold, no check could tempt me
Living through an EKG the only time that they check me
Docs don't even know the cause
But they know that it's deadly
Voicemail when they call
No point of trying to text me
Band on my head
Still post the Lo' cause I'm dying for niggas to try and catch me
Two F's, Four L's, don't matter, still Fendi
And my ex still blocked, she pissed, I'm petty

And I still don't go to the club
And I still couldn't tell you how it feels to give a fuck
I'm on ten, more money, less friends
The circle so small, couldn't fit half of these niggas who's
Life is based off of pretend
Over 2K follows on the Gram
She get stuck on the bench
We met in person, she was cool
But her internet life is not exactly who she is
I just tell her how it is
I made her back bend off a couple jokes and a wine glass
Shit, I'm funny as a bitch
Haha, I'm funny as a bitch

And she the type of shawty that you keep around
Turnt up to the max, I fucked around and blew the speakers out
I don't trust a soul, they letting secrets out
Said he down to ride but he hit the skates soon as beef around
Everybody K, them type of niggas we don't be around
Loaded off the Benny's, it gon be awhile
Before I cop the Fendi, it gon be awhile
It gon be awhile