Pity Party

Sometimes I think I want to disappear
Everything I wish I was seems so completely unattainable
And I hate what I see in the mirror
And the words out of my mouth that I know you can't unhear

You used to be the villain all the time
Now you've gotten nicer and it's blurring all the lines
It seems outrageous I could now be in the wrong
It must be I've been dating you too long

So throw me my pity party
I don't say I'm sorry
You always say it first
That's the only way this thing works

It's not your fault I was already mad
And I take out my frustrations on you when I'm feeling bad
It's just the bitterness that lingers on my tongue
The ghost of every grievance always screaming what you've done

So throw me my pity party
I don't say I'm sorry
You always say it first
That's the only way this thing works

And I, I'm working on patience
I'm trying to unlearn
The cold we created

And I, want to validate your feelings
Even when they're about me
But I guess I'm still healing
From the ways you used to hurt me

So throw me my pity party
I don't say I'm sorry
You always say it first
And that just makes me feel worse

So throw me my pity party
I don't say I'm sorry
You always say it first
That's the only way-
Wait, I don't think this is working