Employee of the Month

Sigurd Utych
Stole some lanterns
Out the back
Of somebody's car
He tried running from
The Long Arm of the Law
Did not get far

We saw his picture on the TV
He was looking rough as hell
Like he had a friend
That helped him up
Then pushed him
Down a well

They say it's hard
Not ever getting what you want
But at least you got
Employee of the month

Sigurd Utych
Bussed some tables
Busted in a couple older ladies' purses
We saw him haunted
Like a ghost
Escorted by some cops
A couple nurses

It seemed someone stole something from him
At least we think they must've tried it once or twice
Oh, and in exchange for
What she took
She left him sticky fingers
Heart of ice

They say it's hard
Not ever getting what you want
But at least you got
Employee of the month

I saw Sigurd down on Washington Street later
Thought I detected an old fire in his eye
Or maybe just the light
Caught something shiny
In the back of someone's car
As they drove by



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