Birthday (Jrew's Version)

All I want for my birthday is a big booty ho
I don't care about the rest of her body though
She could be tall, fat, short, skinny, I don't know
But you better make sure she a ho

Hoes suck at spitting but they're great at swallowing
And ask her if she's ever had one of the following
Syphilis, gonorrhea, or HPV
Crabs, or genital warts or herpes
And don't forget AIDS and HIV
If she said all of the above tell her come see me
Oh she got a flat ass, then I'll send her back
Cause her cheeks should be big enough to swallow my cack
I go all out, balls out, no half-assing it
She better have a butt like Kim Kardashian
She could be an hourglass or even a pear
Shit, I'll take an apple for all I care
Five foot three, weighing in at 250
I'll drop my pants and pork that ass in a jiffy
Don't matter if she Snooki or the size of a Wookie
Long as baby got back, then I bet we can boogie

All I want for my birthday is a big booty ho
I don't care about the rest of her body though
She could be tall, fat, short, skinny, I don't know
But you better make sure she a ho

She said her measurements, but I just heard 40
Cause that ass is the only thing that's making me horny
Fuck balancing a cup, she could balance a gallon
Such a pro with my tool, I call her Tim Allen
Man forget my mistress, my side chick, my salt wife
You the one I've been waiting for my whole life
And pardon me if I may be so bold
But I think that ass has its own area code
So big I call it the thong swallower
Anywhere she goes, man I gotta follow her
Cause she my white whale, call her Moby Dick
And I need a harpoon cause that butt so thick
When she pull them jeans on it take over an hour
And her ass touch the curtain and the wall in the shower
At the same time, she ain't wide, she ain't mine
Her face is a two but her booty's a dime
Every time she walk by, put that shit on rewind
Cause every time she walk by, it's hollering time
Every time she walk by, it's slobbering time
Make my thing rock hard, it's clobbering time

All I want for my birthday is a big booty ho
I don't care about the rest of her body though
She could be tall, fat, short, skinny, I don't know
But you better make sure she a ho

They said, it's your birthday man, what you thinking
I said, I don't know but I been drinking
And I just shaved, might give her the Abe Lincoln
Leave the pubes on her face to let it sink in
Maybe I'll hold her head until she starts gagging
And it comes out her nose like an angry dragon
Might even do both, I don't mean to be bragging
I did always wanna get a bearded dragon, get it
So much junk packed up in her trunk
She had enough for five nights but she just stayed one
Wham bam thank you ma'am
Put some syrup on her cakes and call it a Grand Slam
Then she told me she had chlamydia
Thanks for sharing, I think I put a kid in ya
All instinct, I do it without thinking
Going deep in her hole just like I was digging
To China, to China
I go so deep in her vagina
Bring it right back like a reminder
That thing behind her, I'm digging like a miner

All I want for my birthday is a big booty ho
I don't care about the rest of her body though
She could be tall, fat, short, skinny, I don't know
But you better make sure she a ho

I went down and I found a seafood buffet
She had so many crabs in her fish fillet
I mean, STDs will be my downfall
Pull out my PokeBalls, gotta catch 'em all
She eatin' healthy, bananas, yogurt and nuts
So I pull my penis out and give her fruit by the foot
God damn, if I wasn't so ravenous
I might stop and notice that pussy is cavernous
Cause it hang, like the sleeve of a wizard man
All I do is cum, call me Mister Jizzerman
Everything white, like she in a blizzard man
Now cut the bullshit like a pair of scissors can
Time to go, pick my dick off the floor
And reel it back in like a garden hose
Now she addicted, that gateway ganja
Told her bitch, you can't handle more of the black mamba

All I want for my birthday is a big booty ho
I don't care about the rest of her body though
She could be tall, fat, short, skinny, I don't know
But you better make sure she a ho

Haha, yeah
You better make sure she a ho
No skinny girls, no virgins
No clean girls, I want the dirty version
Leave the condoms at home, cause I'm pro-life
And if she thick enough, I'll make her my wife
Jru are you sure, I'm HIV-positive
Pick your poison girl, I got a lot to give
YOLO, we ain't got that long to live
But it's my birthday, so try to be festive
Call up Hostess and Santa Claus
Get me some Ho-Hos and "Ho Ho Hos"