Anthem of the Wanna-Be Selfless

Staring out from my porch
The neighborhood's all lit up
The couple across the street already have their decorations out

Maybe I should decorate
Maybe I should ask for help
Maybe I should cultivate people I could ask for help from

Tired of failure
Tired of feeling like a ghost
Tired of being so incapable on my own

I'm breaking through
Breaking through
I'm breaking through
Breaking
It's getting to me
Getting to me
Are you scared of being alone

Cause I am
I am

Through all of the places I've been
All of the things that I've seen
It's not enough to put the pieces back together

I feel lost

These streetlights offer light but no warmth
Just illuminating the emptiness around me
An unnatural yellow hue
Separating me from what people see in their waking lives
What you must've seen when your dad would kick you out
Years ago, as you'd walk these streets isolated and alone

Losing my voice
Shouting these songs
Anthems of the regretful
Of the wanna-be selfless
And where was I
Where was I
After you were gone

All these months and for what
Just to fall apart
I feel like the pillars of this bridge
Are the last things holding me up
Keeping me from sinking
From sinking, from sinking
I can't lie
And say the impulse isn't there
But I've already spent so much of my life
Being selfish
I already can't sleep at night
Telling myself it's temporary
But I'm worried
The temporary might last forever

You know this wasn't
What I had planned
I'm sorry
Cal and Max

You know this wasn't
What I had wanted
I'm sorry
Mom and dad

Therapist
Annie
Coworkers
Girl across the street

It's okay
It's alright
It's okay
I'll keep trying

It's okay
It's alright
I'll restart
(It's okay)
A thousand times
(I'll keep trying)

(It's okay)
(It's alright)
(It's okay)
(I'll keep trying)

(It's okay)
(It's alright)
(It's okay)
You know
(I'll keep trying)

(It's okay)
(It's alright)
(It's okay)
(I'll keep trying)

(It's okay)
(It's alright)
(It's okay)
(I'll keep trying)

It's okay
It's alright

It's okay