Balancing the Books

Some say that it is better to have loved and lost
But on reflection I don't think they've properly assessed the cost
For since the day he charmed me with his wit, his looks
I've spent each minute desperately balancing the books
At first it seemed so fresh
And there was money in the bank
The world was at our feet and it was me he had to thank
I thought that we would share it all
I thought that we'd be friends
But now it seems I foot the bill while he just spends and spends
I've budgeted his budgets
And I've Chancelled his Exchequer
I've batted back opponents with the skill of Boris Becker
I've watched his figures day by day with due consistency
But each day it gets harder
Because he stopped watching me
Sometimes I think of turning my back on the man
But on reflection, I conclude that I'm not sure I really can
Perhaps it is a lesson that I'll never learn
I've been investing in a policy with no return
When we first started out it seemed a marriage made in heaven
But somehow he takes two and two
And turns it into seven
So while his luck has multiplied, his power has compacted
He's lost all sight of people who have cruelly been subtracted
I've charted all his charters
And I've lined up all his graphs
And when he needed whole numbers
I made them out of halves
Expenses he has run up I have taken off his hands
And stitched them into documents that no one understands
I've seen the income coming in
I've summed up every sum
But there is nothing new but revenue
The benefits I see are mostly none
No wonder I'm so tense
When our relationship's the principal expense
I've even shown support when he's ignored my best advice
And though they're all his policies it's me who's paid the price
I've taken all the flak for his calamitous defeats
And when he rests on victory, it's me who spreads the sheets
I've customized his customs
And I've debited his debts
And though he knows he's taxing me
He very soon forgets
I'd hold him to account
But my accounting's only shown
He's quickly losing interest
And it's me who's left alone
So now I'm feeling drained of assets and forlorn
He's taken so much out of me that now I'm free of a ton
It's too late for backing out and getting cross
I'm never going to profit from it
When I've suffered such a loss