A Scenic Route to the Isle of Ewe

Up the Bens and Munros
where the freshwater flows,
with mussels we picked in the bay;
on a rock by a river,
a sigh and a quiver
means I surely love you today

So please just ignore all the moods and the maybes,
lift up your skirt and I'll fill you with babies -
let's just stay here for a while,
let's just stay here and smile.

Well, I warned you I'm stupid -
don't blame me, blame Cupid,
his aim's never been all that hot.
But he hit both our hearts
with his random wee darts
and, my love, you just got what you got.

Suck in the air on the peaks and the ridges -
your back is a mess, you're just food for the midges.
I'll stop all the silence and cut out the pouting
if you keep your voice down, they might hear us shouting
and I don't want strangers to know.
And I never want to go.

And the outfit you wore on the banks of the loch,
in a room with a sauna but no kind of clock -
I'm sure all the neighbours could hear my heart boom,
we've got all we need, let's just stay in the room.