The Unihorn

You're the one who makes me giddy-up, baby
These hoofed feet and bare chest have got you thinking maybe
I could get with this, suckle that horn like it's licorice
Until the break of dawn

I know you're ticklish
Despite the warnings of your fickle friends this ride has its benefits
You can be my Pegasus
Your wings will spread until things in bed get ridiculous

Lets put an end to this
And by the end I mean, I'm giving you the tip of tenderness
It's just a subtle reference
You can manhandle my man-candle until the wick is lit

So quick like, lickity-split
I've got the cure for that wet dream Nicotine fit
Blow it out girl, make a wish but give it some spit
Because it's gonna be a night that you'll never forget, like

Just ride the Unihorn and strap that saddle on
Just ride that beast until the early mutha-fuckin' morn!
He's such a sexy thing, just please unzip my fly!
He'll teach you all the things you want to know down-deep inside!

My ivory is lively and ribbed for your pleasure
Let's see how far you can go, break out the tape measure
That look of shock means you're ready to rock
It's such a treasure watching you riding that... Stop!

Not so fast, I want this to last
You'll be breaking this steed, while I'm tapping that
As... we proceed, passion will lead
To a magical seed, creating a new, fantastical breed

As you will see once you're fastened to me
The spur of the moment, combined with this durable component
Makes bestiality a keen reality
More phallic than fallacy, more callous than Caligula

I'm big enough to pierce right through
Your fantasies of actors, and poet's haikus
I've been galloping for days for a girl like you
Half-man, half-equestrian times two

Just ride the Unihorn and strap that saddle on
Just ride that beast until the early mutha-fuckin' morn!
He's such a sexy thing, just please unzip my fly!
He'll teach you all the things you want to know down-deep inside!

Sure it's a challenge balancing on this ballast
Bracing against waves of passion, filling your palette
With an amount of malice for hours with this thoroughbred
You'll need an ice pack afterwards to soothe your head

My hooves'll hurt but once we're through in bed
The proof will spurt in the form of rainbows
We'll wake up in the same clothes
Laying next to a pot of gold already attained though

The goal's been met
You'll still be tossing and turning with night sweats
Just a result of last night's caress
You'll be hugging your bedpost as if it was my likeness

You'll be tugging that bedpost as if it was my likeness

The Unihorn
Such an abstract apparatus, you'll assume I'm deformed

The Unihorn
An acrobat in the sack giving you an asthmatic attack

The Unihorn
Party in the front, saddle in back

The Unihorn
Turning your most secret fantasy into a matter of fact!

Just ride the Unihorn and strap that saddle on
Just ride that beast until the early mutha-fuckin' morn!
He's such a sexy thing, just please unzip my fly!
He'll teach you all the things you want to know down-deep inside!



Credits
Writer(s): Adam Drew, Tim Stiles
Lyrics powered by www.musixmatch.com

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