Billy Joe McGuffrey

Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a very clumsy kid
On the first day of first grade, I'll tell what he did
He tripped over a pencil box, flew up in the air
Landed on a kangaroo and pulled out all his hair

He needed first aid, in the first grade
First aid, in the first grade
First aid, in the first grade
You can buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid

Oh, Bill Joe McGuffrey was a very clumsy kid
On the second day of second grade I'll 'til you what he did
He slipped on a banana peel and flew into the sky
Landed on a chimpanzee who poked him in the eye

He needed first aid, in the second grade
First aid, in the second grade
First aid, in the second grade
You can buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid

Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a very clumsy kid
On the third day of third grade, I'll tell you what he did
He fell out of a fishing boat, splashed into the sea
Landed on a moray eel who bit him on the knee

He needed first aid, in the third grade
First aid, in the third grade
First aid, in the third grade
You can buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid

Twelfth grade

Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a very clumsy kid
On the twelfth day of twelfth grade I'll tell you what he did
He walked into financial aid, fell and broke a bone
Showed them all his bills and got a great big college loan

He needed first aid, in the twelfth grade
First aid, in the twelfth grade
First aid, in the twelfth grade
You can buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid
You can buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid