You Must Meet My Wife [Act One]
So
So
Well, I think it's time to talk about my wife
Don't you?
To boast or complain?
Both, I expect
She lightens my sadness
She livens my days
She bursts with a kind of madness
My well ordered ways
My happiest mistake
The ache of my life
You must meet my wife
She bubbles with pleasure
She glows with surprise
Disrupts my accustomed leisure
And ruffles my ties
I don't know even now quite how it began
You must meet my wife
My Anne
One thousand whims to which give in
Since her smallest tear turns me ashen
I never dreamed that I could live in
So completely demented, contented a fashion
So sun like
So winning
So unlike a wife
I do think that I'm beginning to show signs of life
Don't ask me how at my age one still can grow
If you met my wife you'd know
Dear Fredrik I'm just longing to meet her
Sometime
She sparkles
How pleasant
She twinkles
How nice
Her youth is a sort of present
Whatever the price
The incandescent- what?
The- um
Light?
Of my life, yes
You must meet my wife
Yes, I must
I really must, now-
She flutters
How charming
She twitters
My word!
She floats
Isn't that alarming?
What is she, a bird?
She makes me feel I'm- what?
A very old man?
Yes
No!
No!
But-
I must meet your Gertrude
My Anne (sorry, Anne)
She loves my voice, my walk
My mustache
The cigar, in fact, that I'm smoking
She'll watch me puff until it's just ash
Then she'll save the cigar butt
Bizarre, but-
You're joking
She dotes on-
Your dimple?
My snoring
How dear
The point is she's really simple
Yes, that much seems clear!
She gives me funny names
Like
Old dry-as-dust
Wouldn't she just?
You must meet my wife
If I must
Yes, I must
A sea of whims that I submerge in
Yet, so lovable in repentance
Unfortunately, still a virgin
But, you can't force a flower-
Don't finish that sentence!
She's monstrous!
She's frightened
Unfeeling!
Unversed
She'd strike you as unenlightened
No, I'd strike her first!
Her reticence, her apprehension
Her crust!
No
Yes!
No!
Fredrik
You must meet my wife
Let me get my hatch and my knife!
What was that?
I must meet your wife
Yes, you must (yes, I must!)
So
Well, I think it's time to talk about my wife
Don't you?
To boast or complain?
Both, I expect
She lightens my sadness
She livens my days
She bursts with a kind of madness
My well ordered ways
My happiest mistake
The ache of my life
You must meet my wife
She bubbles with pleasure
She glows with surprise
Disrupts my accustomed leisure
And ruffles my ties
I don't know even now quite how it began
You must meet my wife
My Anne
One thousand whims to which give in
Since her smallest tear turns me ashen
I never dreamed that I could live in
So completely demented, contented a fashion
So sun like
So winning
So unlike a wife
I do think that I'm beginning to show signs of life
Don't ask me how at my age one still can grow
If you met my wife you'd know
Dear Fredrik I'm just longing to meet her
Sometime
She sparkles
How pleasant
She twinkles
How nice
Her youth is a sort of present
Whatever the price
The incandescent- what?
The- um
Light?
Of my life, yes
You must meet my wife
Yes, I must
I really must, now-
She flutters
How charming
She twitters
My word!
She floats
Isn't that alarming?
What is she, a bird?
She makes me feel I'm- what?
A very old man?
Yes
No!
No!
But-
I must meet your Gertrude
My Anne (sorry, Anne)
She loves my voice, my walk
My mustache
The cigar, in fact, that I'm smoking
She'll watch me puff until it's just ash
Then she'll save the cigar butt
Bizarre, but-
You're joking
She dotes on-
Your dimple?
My snoring
How dear
The point is she's really simple
Yes, that much seems clear!
She gives me funny names
Like
Old dry-as-dust
Wouldn't she just?
You must meet my wife
If I must
Yes, I must
A sea of whims that I submerge in
Yet, so lovable in repentance
Unfortunately, still a virgin
But, you can't force a flower-
Don't finish that sentence!
She's monstrous!
She's frightened
Unfeeling!
Unversed
She'd strike you as unenlightened
No, I'd strike her first!
Her reticence, her apprehension
Her crust!
No
Yes!
No!
Fredrik
You must meet my wife
Let me get my hatch and my knife!
What was that?
I must meet your wife
Yes, you must (yes, I must!)
Credits
Writer(s): Stephen Sondheim
Lyrics powered by www.musixmatch.com
Link
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