Trapped In the Closet (Chapters 1-5)

Seven o'clock in the morning
And the rays from the sun wakes me
I'm stretchin' and yawnin'
In a bed that don't belong to me
And a voice yells, "Good morning, darlin'"
From the bathroom
Then she comes out and kisses me
And to my surprise, she ain't you

Now, I've got this dumb look on my face
Like, what have I done?
How could I be so stupid to be have laid
Here 'til the morning sun?
Lost the track of time
Oh, what was on my mind?
From the club, went to her home
Didn't plan to stay that long

Here I am, quickly tryin' to put on my clothes
Searching for my car keys
Tryin' to get on up out the door
Then she streched her hands in front of it
Said, "You can't go this way"
Looked at her, like she was crazy
Said, "Woman, move out my way"
Said, "I got a wife at home"
She said, "Please, don't go out there"
"Lady, I've got to get home"
She said her husband was comin' up the stairs

Shh, shh, quiet
Hurry up, and get in the closet
She said, "Don't you make a sound
Or some shit is going down"
I said, "Why don't I just go out the window?"
"Yes, except for one thing, we on the fifth floor"
Shit, think, shit, think, shit, "Quick, put me in the closet"
And now, I'm in this darkest closet, tryin' to figure out
Just how I'm gonna get my crazy ass up out this house

Then he walks in and yells, "I'm home"
She says, "Honey, I'm in the room"
Walks in there with a smile on his face
Sayin', "Honey, I've been missin' you"
She hops all over him
And says, "I've cooked and ran your bath water"
I'm tellin' you now, this girl's so good that she deserves an Oscar

Throws her in the bed
And start to snatchin' her clothes off
I'm in the closet, like man, what the fuck is going on?
You're not gonna believe it
But things get deeper as the story goes on
Next thing you know, a call comes through on my cell phone
I tried my best to quickly put it on vibrate
But from the way he act, I could tell it was too late
He hopped up and said, "There's a mystery going on
And I'm gonna solve it"
And I'm like, "God, please, don't let this man open this closet"

He walks in the bathroom
And looks behind the door
She says, "Baby, come back to bed"
He says, "Bitch, say no more"
He pulls back the shower curtain
While she's biting her nails
Then he walks back to the room
Right now, I'm sweating like Hell
Checks under the bed
Then under the dresser
He looks at the closet
I pull out my Baretta
He walks up to the closet
He goes up to the closet
Now, he's at the closet
Damn, he's opening the closet

Well...
Now, he's staring at me like
As if he was starin' in a mirror
She yells, "Honey, let me explain"
He says, "You don't have to go no further
I can clearly see what's goin' on
Behind my back, in my bed, in my home"
Then I said, "Wait a minute, now, hold on"
I said, "Mister, we can work this out"
She said, "Honey, don't lose control"
Tried to get him to calm down
He said, "Hoe, I should've known
That you would go and do some bogus shit up in my house
But the Christian in me gave you the benefit of the doubt"
I said, "We need to resolve this"
Then he stepped to me, I'm like "Whoa
There's a reason I'm in this closet"
He says, "Yeah, like, what? Are you takin' clothes?"
"I met this girl at the Plagis club
And she told me she didn't have a man"
Then he said, "Man, please
I'd kill you if you didn't have that gun in ya hand"
And I said, "But yo' chick choose me"
He said, "Don't give me that mack shit, please"
His phone goes off, and then things get a little more interesting
He steps a little closer
I point my gun and says, "I'm not the one you after"
He says, "Son, I bet you didn't know my man
Did she tell you that I was a pastor?"
I said, "Well, good, that's betta, right?
Why can't we handle this Christian-like?"
And I started to put the gun down
'Til I saw his face, still had that frown
She started cryin', sayin', "Baby, I'm sorry"
Then he said, "Baby, not as sorry as you're gonna be"
I started inchin' out
He says, "No, I want you to see this"
Said, "I gotta get out this house"
He said, "Not 'til I reveal my secret"
I'm like, "What is goin' on inside his head?"
Then he takes his phone and calls somebody up and says
"Hello, baby, turn the car around
Listen, I just need for you to get right back here now" (Click)
He looks at me and says, "Well, since we're all comin' out the closet
I'm not about to be the only one that's broken-hearted"
She said, "What do you mean?"
And he said, "Just wait and see"
I said, "Somebody betta talk to me"
And then his phone ring
He picks up and somebody says, "Sweetheart, I'm downstairs"
And he's like, "I'll buzz you up
I'm on the fifth floor, hurry, take the stairs"
And I'm like, "Who is this mystery lady that you're talking to?"
He says, "In time, you both will know the shockin' truth
Baby, this is something I been wanting to get off my chest for a long, long time"
Then I said, "Nigga, I'ma shoot you both if you don't say what's on ya mind"
He said, "Wait, I hear somebody comin' up the stairs"
And I'm lookin' at the door
He says, "I think you betta sit down in the chair"
I says, "I'm gonna count to four"
"One", he says, "Mister, wait"
"Two", she says, "Please, don't shoot"
"Three", he says, "Don't shoot me"
Four, she screams
Then a knock on the door, the guns in my hands
He opens the door, I can't believe it is a man (man, man, man)

Well, here we are, the four of us
In total shock me and her
I close my mouth and swallow spit
As I'm thinking to myself, "This is some deep shit"
Then I said, "So, you're gonna tell me he's the one
You've been talking to"
He says, "Yes", I says, "No", he says, "Yes", I says, "No"
He says, "It's the truth"
I yell, "All of ya'll asses crazy
Let me up out this door, because this is way more than I bargoned for"
And then she says, "Wait
I'm sure we can all fix this", then I said, "I'm late
Plus I ain't got a damn thing to do with this"

Then she said, "Wouldn't you like to know
Just how it all began?"
Then I thought to myself and said, "Quick, you got three minutes"
Then it got real quiet
I said, "Somebody start talkin'"
And then she said, "My God, Ruphus, I got just one question
How could you do something like this? I'm so hurt!"
He looked at her and said, "Bitch, please, you got
Yo' nerves with all yo' club hoppin'
Lying, sayin' you was shoppin'
And now, here you are in
Our home, and you calling
Me wrong", she said, "Okay, you busted me
And that much I agree
You caught me cheating
But this is a little extreme"
He said, "You are my wife
Sleeping behind my back
And now, I come home, and you got him in the closet
How extreme is that?"

She says, "But she's a he"
Then he says, "Please, you can't judge me"
She says, "Ruphus, this is crazy"
And I said, "Stop aguing
I did not stay here to hear y'all chew
Each other out, so get to the point
Or, I swear, I'm out", "Excuse me, please
But I think I can explain what's going in
Here, my name is Chuck, and I've been
Knowin' Ruphus for 'bout a year
At midnight, creeping around with him, it's been a living Hell
Sneaking in and out of hotels"
I said, "Brother, spare me
The details", then Ruphus said, "Chuck, please
Don't say nothin' else", then she screams, "Ruphus
You son of a bitch"
And he says, "Cathy, go to Hell"
I said, "I thought you name was Mary
That's what you said at the party
Man, this is getting scary
I'm gonna shoot somebody"

Then Ruphus starts yellin' and screaming
Saying, "Cathy, this is all yo' fault"
She throws a pillow at him
And says, "You was creepin' too, the only difference
Is you didn't get caught"
Chuck screams out, "We're in love"
Cathy says, "Love my ass"
Ruphus say they gettin' married
Then I shoot one in the air
Then I say, "Not another one of
You, sons of bitches, say a word
'Cause all of this shit I'm going through
Is unheard", grab my celluar
Sayin', "This is so wrong"
Call up my home
And a man picks up the phone (phone, phone)

Now, I'm dashin' home
Doin' 85
Swervin' lane to lane
With fire in my eyes
I got a million thoughts
Goin' through my mind
I'm thinkin' about, "What I'ma do and who
I'm gonna do it to when I get home?"
How could I have been so blind?
And then I look in my rear view
I cannot believe this
(Woo-woo-woo)
Damn, here comes a policeman
He drove right up on me and flashed his light
Then I pulled over without thinkin' twice
He hopps out the car and walked over to me
And said, "License and registration, please"
I looked up at him and said
"Officer, is there somethin' wrong?"
He said, "No, except you was doin' 60 in a 40 mile zone"
Then I said, "Officer
Let me explain, please
Ya see, the truth of the matter is
Is that I got an emergency"
He said, "No excuses
And no exceptions"
He flicks his cigarette and then gives me the ticket
Said, "Have a nice day" and walked away
I said, "Yeah, right" and drove away
Then I turned my radio on
And did 55 all the way home
I pulled up in the driveway
Hopped out and slammed the car door
Then go around the back
Bust up in the house, pull back the shower door, and she screamin'
"What's all that for?"
Then I'm like, "Woman, I called this house
And a man picked up my phone"
Then she said, "Calm down
Did you forget
My brother Twan came home?
"Oh..."
And that's all I could say was, "Oh"
With a stupid look on my face
Said, "I forgot he came home today"
And she said, "That's okay"
Because, honey, I understand"
She said, "You don't have to explain"
Then I took her by the hand
I kissed her, and then we went to the room
Then I turned some music on
Apologized one more time
Then went down, and start gettin' it on
And she started bitin' her lips
Grabbing me and makin' noise
Now we makin' love, and she's my ear, whisperin'
"It's all yours"
I said, "I love you"
And she said, "I love ya, too"
Then a tear fell up out my eye
Then I called her my sunshine
And then she looked at me
And said, "Baby, go deeper, please"
And that's when I start goin' crazy
Like I was tryin' to give her a baby
The room feel like it's spinnin'
We keep turnin' and turnin'
As if we were in a whirlwind
The way our toes are curlin'
The next thing ya know, she starts goin' real wild
And screamin' my name
Then I said, "Baby, we must slow down
Before I bust a vessel in my brain"
And she said, "Please, no, don't stop"
And I said, "I caught a cramp"
And she said, "Please, keep on goin'"
I said, "My leg is about to crack"
Then she cries out
"Oh, my goodness, I'm about to climax"
And I said, "Cool
Climax
Just let go of my leg"
She says, "You're the perfect lover"
I said, "I can't go no futher"
Then I flip back the cover
Oh, my God, a rubber (rubber, rubber)

And now, I'm like
"Well, well, well
What the fuck is this?
A condom in my bed
Ya better start talkin', bitch
'Fore I take a match and
Burn this muthafucka down"
I said you, "Better start talkin'
And start talkin' right God damn now"
Then she said, "Baby
I'm so speechless"
Then I said, "My baby
You gone be breathless
If ya don't start talkin' quick
Woman, I'm gone have a fit
You don't know what ya fuckin' with
Girl, ya better cut the bullshit
Now it's obvious somebody has been all up in my home
In my bed, and plus, I smell cigarettes"
Now and sniffin' and lookin' around
Suspicious like someone's here
Then I looked in her eyes and in her eyes
There was so much fear
Pull out my gun said, "Is he still here?"
She shook her head and said, "No"
I'm checkin' behind every door
She cried out, "He left right after you called"
I said, "What the fuck was you thinking?
You thought that I wouldn't find this out?"
Then I said, "You must be crazy or on crack
To have somebody off up in my muthafuckin' house"
She hopped up and said, "That's enough"
She said, "I can't take no more"
And then she said, "You made your point
But now it's time to even the score"
She said, "I know all about last night
And where you went when you left the club"
Said, "That's right, nigga, I was there
With this guy in the back of the club"
I said, "I thought you was with yo' girls
She said, "I thought you was with yo' guys"
She said, "You was at that bitche's house
And don't even try to act suprised"
Said, "Baby", she said, "Shut up
Don't you say a word
It ain't nothin' you can say
That I ain't already heard"
Then I said, "Woman, don't you try to turn it all around
'Cause the fact still remains that someone else was in my house"
Then she said, "You're right about that
Somethin' did go down, but I don't have to turn it around
'Cause what goes around, comes back around"
I'm movin' a little closer to her
She's trippin' over the furniture
She said, "Wait first, just let me explain"
I said, "No need to, just give me his name"
And then she said, "Uh... uh"
I say, "Uh, what?"
She said, "Please, sit down in a chair"
And I say, "No, I'm standin' up"
And she cries out, "I'm so scared to tell you
Because of what ya might do"
And I screamed, "Look, girl, you better
Give me this man's name, and I'm not playin' with you"
She says, "Okay", wipes her nose and asks me about a girl named Tina
I thought to myself, said, "It sound familiar"
I said, "I probably know her if I seen her"
Then I say, "Anyway, girl, what the hell does
That got to do with this man?"
She said, "He know my girl Roxanne"
I said, "Who the hell is Roxanne?"
Then she says, "Roxanne's a friend of mine
Who know with this guy named Chuck
Chuck's cool with this guy name Rufus"
And I'm sittin' here, like, what the fuck?
Then she says, "Rufus' wife, Cathy
We both went to high school
She introduced me to
The policeman that stopped you"