Loss, Metaphorically

I've lost you and I don't know what to do
Can't even leave my house because of you
You helped me open doors and go on through
The I found you and that hurts just as much too
Cause you're my car keys
I'm sitting on my car keys
All three are sticking into me
Why do I need a sperate trunk key?
Car keys vertically in me
Metaphorically

This crushing pain that I feel way down deep inside
I lost my pride and I feel like I died
You used to always be my guide
Now I can't feel you anymore
Why must you try to hide?
Cause you're my testical
I'm sitting on my ball
You went numb and I don't know if I'll feel you again at all?
You're so big that's how you make me feel so small
Cause it's a tall fall onto my ball
Metaphorica-ooooooooo-lly

I lost you and you were a human being who I was in a relationship with
There is no possible way that I can ambiguously misconstrue this one
I'm talking about my ex-girlfriend you people
Not a joke this time
I found her underneath my...

Butt
Cause I'm sitting on my girlfriend
Inside a purse
On my keys and balls
Sitting on my girlfriend
Keys and balls
Keys and balls and girlfriend

Just the left side
And the right side
And the middle
And the back
And in the front
And outside in the hall
And in the stairwell
And the kitchen
And the lobby
And all the people, everybody

Just the ladies
And the men
And the people in between
Like tranvestites, and transexuals,
Intergener, hermapherdites,
And genderqueer, and anybody who dosen't identify themselves as just one label

Girlfriend, keys and balls
Keys and balls and girlfriend
Balls

Metaphorically