Trap 3 Little Pigs

JTK

Once, a pig built up a house
The house was of straw that he bought from the town
One day, a wolf came and saw the little pig
He came to the pig's door and then the wolf said

"Little pig, little pig, let me in"
"Not by the hairs of my chinny chin chin"
So I huffed and I puffed, and I blew that thing down
Next thing I knew, he was running around
So I chased that pig down
Wanted some bacon, so I had to go to his big brother's house
Said I blew that thing down
Little Red Riding Hood didn't ride home, so I'm after you now
I'm a real alpha wolf, this ain't Little Bo Peep
Don't try and cry "wolf", I ain't here for no sheep
No McDonald's money, so y'all are my treat
And if we do the race, all I need are some cleats

Run to the market, Pig, you can run home
Go get your roast beef, but i'll catch you for sure
You look like a snack, and I don't mean you're cute
But I bet you'll look good with some veggies and fruit

Little pig, you're sweating, just take a little break
Just make this thing easy and hop on my plate
I'm trying to get home to play Fortnite today
And I can't come back late, Mama Wolf doesn't play

Pig told the wolf, "Oh I'm leaving
Mama ain't make me this thick to be eaten
You're big and bad 'til my big bro gets even
And no, I won't slow, Wolf, I trained for track season"

Don't run up that hill, Pig, you're not Jack and Jill
Don't climb up that wall, have a great fall for real
I need food to serve while I go on this date
So don't make me look bad, I can't make Wolfy wait

Lucky for Pig I had worn the wrong kicks
So he got to his brother's house made out of sticks
Wolf came up after and saw the little pigs
He came to the pigs' door and then the wolf said

"Little pig, little pig, let me in"
"Not by the hairs of our chinny chin chin"
So I huffed and I puffed, and I blew that thing down
Next thing I knew, he was running around
So I chased that pig down
Wanted some bacon, so I had to go to his big brother's house
Said I blew that thing down
Little Red Riding Hood didn't ride home, so I'm after you now
I'm a real alpha wolf, this ain't Winnie the Pooh
Don't try and cry "wolf", I'm not lying to you
My McDonald's money is low, so you'll do
And I've got the right shoes, so it's over for you

Come here little pigs, I need my two-course meal
This is a fairy tail, but I'm for real
I had mary's little lamb, but a wolf's hungry still
I need food that will fill

I need some bacon!
I need some fries!
I need some pork with some pie on the side!
I need some sausage with beans and some rice!
I need that candlelit dinner tonight!

Pig told the wolf, "Oh you're tripping for real
I'm way too cute for a snack, I'm a meal
We came from the mud, we've had worse wolves we've beat
Yes, we're pigs but you don't want this beef!"

You know what little pig, I'm tired, I'm not here to play
If I don't bring dinner, I won't have a bae
You don't even follow me back on the 'Gram
So don't think you can beat me, I'm about to go ham!

Lucky for them I had tripped on a stick
So they made it to their brother's house made of brick
Wolf came up after and saw the little pigs
He came to the pigs' door, and then the wolf said

"Little pig, little pig, let me in"
"Not by the hairs of our chinny chin chin"
So I huffed and I puffed, trying to blow that thing down
But that house was of brick, and it stayed in the ground
So I blew even harder, a real wolf won't quit
No I'm not chief but I swear this is it
And I would have had that pig's house blown into bits
But my asthma was acting up, I had to sit
Lucky for me, a wolf got his degree
So I made up a plan to get all the piggies
They'll think I'm beat and I'll fake a retreat
Then, I'll jump on the roof and right down the chimney

One pig said, "He stopped blowing his hot breath"
They heard footsteps and knew what was next
So they played their mixtape, got the fireplace lit
Then they waited for Wolf to come in

Pigs, I'm coming down the chimney, about to fatten up like Santa Claus
Ah! Okay, the chimney's feeling kind of hot!
All of you are lucky I'm going vegan
Just wait 'til me and my pack come back again
The end

JTK