Good Enough

A second of a minute of feeling like I'm a candidate
A minute to an hour of always feeling inadequate
An hour's now a day to a month of complete abandonment
A month turned to a couple of years I been feeling out of it

And i dont wanna keep on always going down this road
But i dont know of anything to help keep me warm when it's cold
And i dont got nobody else that could really represent home
And i dont got nobody else except you to call on my phone

Yea These feelings i ain't sorted yet
Back of the head I'm storing em
I'm Keeping all our memories hidden like i was hoarding em

My presence has no glory I'm
looking for an historian
Doing 80 on 40 while whippin in a delorean

I run around my problems cause you ain't answered my question
But if i believe the truth then I'm catching up to depression
He's a minute behind but now he's catching up to a second
Him and dad is always calling but i aint leave em a message yea

I always thought it was guards that you kept on putting up
And now I'm starting to think that I'm not good enough
You always said that our friendship would stay continuous
But now I'm starting to see that I'm not good enough

I thought you were the sneeze that I'm holdin but i keep going atchu
Do you ever catch all the kisses that I keep blowing at you
I just wanna know if Im justified reaching out to you
I've been through so much pain that there's nothing i wont amount to do

So if I have to call you every single day then imma do it
Always going crazy been telling myself i fucking blew it
I dont like the thought of not knowing even my next of movements
All i do is talk about love but I've fucking never knew it

The Peter to your Parker your name is stuck in my spider web
I'm hanging onto love in a place that I'll never find you in
I thought that i could maybe move on from this place and fight again
A broken heart in pieces and demons is what I'm fighting with

You're as clever as the smart and as beautiful as the best
I put my heart inside your hands and you end up taking my breath
And when you conquer all the things in your life you wanted to get
But I just wonder if I'll ever be good enough to be next

I always thought it was guards that you kept on putting up
And now I'm starting to think that I'm not good enough
You always said that our friendship would stay continuous
But now I'm starting to see that I'm not good enough

Maybe one day imma make it and maybe one day I'll find you
Maybe one day imma fake it and act like i never liked you

Maybe I could try to reign it in
Maybe keep on containing it
Or Maybe find a life that is suited for all the pain I'm in

And Maybe i can fight it
Or maybe there's something like it
Or maybe the words I write
Could never truly describe it

I should talk to you in private
I'm running on auto pilot
But I'm hiding my feelings from the person i want to find it