A Day in Richard's Life

Xanax: Close your eyes
Open your mind
Your journey's about to begin
Relax your karma
And try not to barf
As the universe starts to spin
Hocus Pocus
Expialidocious
Set your aura free!
Petrificus Totalus
Drink deeply from the chalice
Tell us what you see!

King Richard: I see a door!
Xanax: Go through it!

Court: The king is dead long live the king
The king is dead long live the king!
Where is his son who'll inherit everything?

Cook: Is that you sire? So handsome.
King Richard: No. That's my much older brother, Kingsley
Young Richard: I can't see anything!
Court: Shut up you!
Young Richard: I can't--
Court: Shut up!
Cook: Oh dear
King Richard: I ate my feelings, and a lot of bread
Court: The sword, your highness, here's the royal sword!
Kingsley: No one gives me anything
Court: To be the king you must receive the sword!
Kingsley: If I want something I take it
And I don't want to be any king
Queen: Ah, but Kingsley it's your destiny
We literally named you Kingsley, God told us to
It's not like we were being trendy
Kingsley: My destiny lies beyond the castle walls, Mother
I'm going to conquer and kill
And spread bastard children throughout the land like wildflower seeds
Somebody else can sit on their ass and rule
Queen: But who?
Court: (Who?) But who? (Who?)
Queen: But who? (Who?)
(Young Richard farts)
Court: Brilliant. Gareth, you shall be the king's guard
Young Gareth: I'm only 10 but, alright
I'm Gareth and I'll rightfully serve you my king
Court: The sword, your highness!
Here's your royal sword!
To be the king you must--
Kingsley: Actually, I think I will take the sword
Young Richard: But it's the King's sword and I'm the king
Kingsley: Fine, if you want it then by all means
Take it from me



Credits
Writer(s): Glenn Evan Slater, Alan Irwin Menken
Lyrics powered by www.musixmatch.com

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